Posted in Everyday

The Struggle Is Real

I need a new job but so far I’ve been avoiding looking for one, mostly because the process of finding one is overwhelming insanity to me.

First I need to figure out what I want to do. This should be the easy step, right? Wrong. I have no idea what I want to do. All I know for sure is I can’t do retail anymore. Retail makes me want to die inside for oh so many reasons. Anything but retail (okay, almost anything). Something in an office might be a nice change, but I have practically no office experience, so that makes things a bit tricky. I need something that doesn’t necessarily have to be a career right away, but I’d like it to at least be a step in that direction. A starting position somewhere that gives me a more stable work schedule and paycheck is the ideal right now, but that still leaves things pretty open. It is incredibly hard to make a budget when one week I’m making $500 and the next only $100. There’s too much uncertainty.

Next I need to know where to look. Pretty much everything’s online, which makes things both easier and more difficult. No matter how many times I’ve explained it to him, my dad still can’t quite wrap his head around the fact that most places are online applications only and they’ll turn you away if you come to them in person, resume in hand. “Why don’t you just drop off your resumes at places?” “Because dad, it doesn’t work like that anymore!” Falls on death ears every time.

If I do manage to find an agreeable enough sounding job, fill out all the information they want, maybe write a cover letter about why I’m awesome and should work here, and they think, alright she doesn’t seem too crazy, then inevitably I’ll come face to face with the dreaded interview. I am the worst at interviews. They turn me into a panic-stricken nincompoop who blanks on the simplest questions no matter how much I’ve prepared. Interviews terrify me. It’s a wonder I’ve ever managed to get a job of any sort.

Unfortunately, this is all a part of life, and I need to suck it up whether I’m ready or not. If I’m going to be a real adult, then I’m going to need to get a real adult job. Phwoar. Okay. Okay. I can do this.

The struggle really is real guys. Ugh.


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